For you imbecile out there, that is Mikhail Gorbachev, the former President of the Soviet Union before they kick his ass and turn USSR into Russia and gave it to Boris Yeltsin.

Gorbachev is one of the new faces emblazoning Louis Vuitton latest campaign. Please don’t ask me why.

My father bought my nephew a cheap (read: shoddily made in China) electronic keyboard. The toy, which seems innocent enough, is not that innocent. I was watching my nephew playing with it until I saw a word that is not supposed to be on child’s toy. It is so irrelevant I’m still wondering how the hell that word made it on the list.

And do check out all the typos. Like the Arabs, you can also trust the Chinese to butcher the English language.

‘No, the English version,’ I said. ‘This is the Malay version, see?’ I pointed to the translated title on the book, just below the picture of Dumbledore and Harry looking into the pensieve. She immediately called one of her colleague to help me look for the English version. From there I could see that this woman obviously just started working here.

I must say, I kinda like the Malay version of the book. There’s a nicely done artwork by Mary GrandPré on the cover. Bookstores in Malaysia only carry the British version, both adult and children version. I couldn’t find the adult cover so I end up purchasing the children’s one.


I did not plan to buy Half-Blood Prince, but I was already a few chapters into Deathly Hallows and I was lost. I just knew I had to read Half-Blood Prince first. Damn you J.K. Rowling! And I must say I was quite impressed with myself. I started reading Half-Blood Prince on Sunday, and yesterday, I finished Deathly Hallows. It took me only 6 days to read both book. Impressive eh?

I’m not going to comment on HBP, most of you must’ve read it like 2 years ago, but let’s talk about Deathly Hallows. It is a relief to see Harry Potter taking his final bow, and with a bang. I do find a few chapters a little draggy, like the part where the trio (Harry, Ron and Hermione) were stuck in the forest, apparating from one place to another, for a few weeks. And what is up with all the deaths? Let’s just say that the two spoilers I posted before this are just a fraction of the death that you will encounter in the book. I don’t remember seeing this much death in a book before. Not ever from Puzo’s Godfather.

For me, the best part chapter in the book is The Prince’s Tale, a chapter dedicated to the memory of Severus Snape after he was killed by Voldermort. I’m not gonna spoil it here, seeing how I already told you he was killed by V, but I could’ve never known that under that Brylcreem laden hair, lies a very sensitive and sad man with an undying love for the woman he inadvertently helped kill 17 years ago.

This is going to piss a whole lot of Harry Potter fans, but I think the Harry Potter series is far from being brilliant. It is a fascinating story, but simple. Tolkien is brilliant, so is Rushdie and Dickens, but not Rowling.

Check this out! Beyonce was performing at her concert in Orlando and during one of her set, got extremely excited with her dance and fall down a flight of stairs, and get this, FACE FIRST! That was totally awesome. For some odd reason, I hate this pretentious slag.

Unless you're Madonna, I don't think you should be doing any extreme moves on stage.

Check it out, I got my copy of Deathly Hallows, and without pre-ordering and going through all the brouhaha! You guys should know by now that some queer bookstores in Malaysia refused to sell the book because the publisher decides to sell it at much lower price to hypermarkets like Carrefour and Tesco. What they didn’t know is that not all states in Malaysia are privileged with hypermarkets so the only way for them to get the book is through bookstores.

Seriously, those bookstores need to stop being such a sourpuss. International bookstores like Kinokuniya and Borders didn’t give a damn, so I don’t understand why local bookstores should. This is why you should never hire aging has-been bitches with sand in their vagina to run a business. In the end of the day, they will get all pussy and instead of fighting back, they get into denial and starts pointing fingers.

Well, all is well now. I got my copy at Tesco by the way, for only RM69.90. That’s roughly Euro 15, USD$20.00 or GBP10! Yes, 10 pounds. Those people in Britain must be jealous, seeing how their own people (Tesco is British) is selling the book cheaper in other countries. But I don’t think it will make that much of an impact though. Malaysia has more drug addicts than readers, so no matter how expensive or how cheap, it’s a lost cause.

Fuck all this talk about spoilers. It’s a goddamn book for fucks sake so just shut up and read the book. And for the people who love spoilers, let me spoil it for you. The authenticities of these spoilers are questionable, but they sound legible enough. But if I’m not mistaken, I read somewhere that Jo Rowling said there is going to be only two deaths in the final book. But from the spoilers, sounds like someone is trigger happy with her typewriter and goes on a killing spree. A wee bit simple though. I thought Jo Rowling could’ve come up with more original stuff. Ok, here goes:

Burbage dies (who the fuck is Burbage???)
Hedwig dies (its an owl you idiot, lets move on)
Mad-Eye dies (this glass-eyed freak dies? ROCK ON!)
Scrimgeour dies (what the fuck??? Who the hell is this??)
Wormtail dies (die you stupid midget!)
Dobby dies (should’ve died earlier. I really want to kill him in Chamber of Secrets)
Voldemort kills Snape (this, I don’t know why. Too much hair gel on Snape’s head I guess, and bald Voldermort is jealous or something)

Hagrid, Malfoy, Neville survive. (yawn....)

Ron marries Hermione (finally! They should’ve fuck each other silly in the first year itself)

Harry marries Ginny (what the hell?? What the hell happen to that Chinese chick he was lusting over??)

Their children attend Hogwarts together (big whoop! what do you expect, they send their kids to Sandhurst?)

The final two sentences are: “The scar had not pained Harry for eighteen years. All was well.” (You just wait. Jo Rowling got something up her sleeve. “Harry Potter and the Magical Monkey from Timbuktu” perhaps?)

Also, Draco Malfoy is balding by the end of the book. (Too much peroxide. This is a given)

The hottest redhead in the music industry is back! Shirley Manson and her gang is here to bite us in the ass, albeit with a compilation album. I was hoping for a new studio album, but this should do just fine. Hope they are hard at work in the studio, concocting new materials for their next release. They did however, manage to record a few new singles for Absolute Garbage, and my current favorite is "Tell Me Where It Hurts".

Saw the video on MTV and loving it! She looks hotter than ever. She can even be seen wearing the YSL bag that I whored on my blog last April. The track is classic Garbage, a catchy and upbeat rock number with a melancholic bridge somewhere in the middle. Could've easily mistaken for a track from Version 2.0, the best Garbage album ever.

Absolute Garbage will hit record stores near you this month, but for cheapskates, the album was leaked onto the internet two days ago.

I’m loving this news more and more. You guys should know by now that our gov is cracking down on website running high yield “supposedly” investment, whatever fuck that means. And one of the website that was closed down a few weeks ago was none other than the one ran by a certain “Suisse” called “esuissefund”. Originally called “eswissfund”, they change the “Swiss” spelling to “Suisse” as not to be confused with another “supposedly” investment program, eswisscash. I am very much surprised that the Swiss gov didn’t do anything to smite these motherfuckers’ asses for sullying the name of their country, but I guess they are more dignified not doing so. Feeding the trolls with more bullets would be futile. Idiots will always be idiots.

I got into trouble with “esuissefund” die hard fans earlier this year, and it was fun. You should see them trying to defend their so called “3-figure salary a day”. Wow, that is as much as what a doctor’s get in a day! The “Suisse” people must be filthy rich to actually give those idiots that much money. Unfortunately, their deliciously dim-witted comments were deleted when I change my website layout. But I think I still have them saved somewhere in Haloscan. Here’s an excerpt of an “esuissefund” fan:

Comment 1:

Hmmmm what a nice crap!!!! Everybody is entitle for his / her opinion.. so am I.... The key word here is `RISK’

Where do I want to start.. Lets see.... Ok.. lets start from `Hey, I am all for getting rich, but a scheme is not my thing'. When people starts a business, they are expose to all kind of risks... same as playing in stock market, buying a house for investment, buying 3D n hope u strike it big!!!., buying / selling bullshit, etc... its all boils down to your own risk appetite. If u are a risk taker, most probably u have your own business or try to own a business. If u are not, then just stay put and earn your monthly salary day in day out….. ohhh and then every year, u gonna get a miserable increment and also bonus (if there is such a word)… Using this scheme gonna make u rich someday???? Think hard, think very hard…. Please think again if being a salaries worker will ever make you rich!! Its all boils down to risk… so take calculated risk!!!!!

If u dont have any intention to change yourself and want to be poor all the time... so be it... Again its really up to each individual to change their own life. Of course in any business, there will be business which will succeed and also fails, it’s the same with any HYIP or MLM. Again, the risk factor!!!!!

Of course money dont grow on tree!!!! alo!!!! If u ask even standard 1 student also they can answer this Q. But if u think again, money does grow on tree.. Let me see.. If you plant, let say a durian tree… there will come a point in time where it will yield some fruits, so u can sell them…. So what u get…. M.O.N.E.Y…. So money does grow on tree. But also there might be trees which will not yield any fruits!!!!! So its up to the person how they take care of the tree or their business or their investment….

About scam…. U are only less than half right…. For a person to put their money in anything regardless get-rich-scheme, business, stocks, just because they listen to their friend, I agree… they are stupid… So are u one of them? Or are u gonna do your own study/ analyst about the pro n con??? If u’re smart uare gonna choose the latter….

the saccharine and aspartame laden success story coz one word, BULLSHIT! Alo!!! I’m a living example that a program can work…. Yes I said CAN… This is my 1st investment and I have recoupe my investment and earn a steady income… read this `THREE FIGURES AMOUNT ON A DAILY BASIS WITH THE FIRST FIGURE A FIVE.’ I don’t need to get other to join, I don’t need to get any downliners!!!!! It all boils down to the Risk n Reward…..

Comment 2:

What an ugly face you have Ari Miraj. You remind me to a dog which likes to sniff the pig shit. Say, I think you better wipe your nose because there's something looks like a dighead on it.

Yo! Bullshit guy,

Where on earth you get the fucking idea that EsuisseFund is from Swiss country?!! You fool!! Use your eyes that looks like pig shit, open it wide and tell me is there any SWISS spelled in EsuisseFund?!!!

If EsuisseFund is NOT INVESTMENT then what should I calll it?

Now, dighead, read this carefully:

With the advent of the internet many persons believed that using the internet they will be able to reach about everyone in the whole world and make a fortune, but is that idea original? Google for example have stored over 3 billion websites in their databases, that means that millions of persons thought the same, and now you are left in the same point, how can you make more money if the competence is million times bigger, which in some way is the same as if you had a local grocery store in which every 100 meters there is another one. Only 1% of the websites in the world are making money while the other 99% are just making mediocre profits for the effort made.

In order to make money you need much more preparation than just the education you received at school, there are many factors that you need to have in consideration that maybe you are not even aware of: what about doing a business plan? what about considering worst case scenarios? what about amortization plan? what about the many extra hours you have to work to make it work? what about marketing? what about market studies?
Related to hard work and misconceptions, we are very used to see many POP music stars and we say there are so many out there and they make lots of money with their work and suddenly you say well its good to be a POP star, have you ever seen shows in which you choose the next music superstar? Did you know that in order to select a group of 20 potential stars they have filtered over 14.000 star wannabes? and from those 14.000 only 1 will be chosen as the music star? Now everything in this world is just like that, you are being filtered everywhere in order to reach what you have been taught to be easy to do.

Continuing with the same analogy: Have you ever seen those shows in which the Music Stars show their big homes and luxurious cars? or those reality shows in which they show you their everyday life? Haven`t you noticed that they don`t have a life at all? they just work, work, work and work a little more... they don`t even enjoy the money they make as we always dream we would enjoy the money if we had it. That is because no matter what you do , something good, something bad or whatever there is an effort required from your part to make it a reality. Why do you think marriages in Hollywood don`t last? could be because they never see each other for working so much?
The point we are trying to make here is that there is nothing free in this world, for

Yes, those were their actually comments. Always put a laugh in my face. That is South Park funny there. I’m just glad that the Securities Commissions decided to do something about this entire “supposedly” investment programs and put an end to it. If I’m not mistaken, they just blocked the whole thing so people may be able to reach the website using a proxy. But like I said, idiots will always be idiots. If they are “smart” enough to actually invest in a “supposedly” investment program, they might no be smart enough to know what the hell a proxy is. Now, when you click http://www.esuissefund.com, you will be greeted with this:


Hey you rich bugger with “esuissefund” money, what about throwing me some of that hard earned cash, eh? Come on, I helped a little, don’t I?

Saw this on a door of a public toilet. The writing in the blue marker reads "Only idiots write on this door". Speechless....

When I got stuck in this:


At 11.00 pm, on a weekend!

Son of a bitch, just because there’s a car pileup on the road, which ironically, is on the OTHER SIDE OF THE ROAD, I had to endure around 30 minutes of nail-biting moment. It’s like being in a Fear Factor competition. Damn those Malaysian drivers and their “inquisitive” manner!

I am so not driving my sister’s car anymore (when it is on “E” that is). She has got to be the laziest woman I know. She can spend 2-3 hours shopping, but she can’t take 10 minutes out of her life to swipe the credit card and fill up her gas tank.

I went to a bris on Saturday. Well, not exactly a bris, they already chopped the knob off the kid but this is an after party, sort of. It was realty elaborate. They had a stage, kinda like the one you see at weddings, for the kid to sit on. The kid was garbed in a silly costume that made him look like a stage actor. A lot of people came, we pray for the kid’s safe journey into adulthood. They even provide goody bag, filled with chips, crisps, a 50 cent towel and a salted duck egg. I know, the goody bag screams “cheap”, but I really don’t understand the duck egg though.

When I had my knob chopped off, the affair was slightly low key. In fact, if I can remember correctly, they bought me a cake. But I was in such severe pain, physically and emotionally, to actually enjoy the cake. Plus the embarrassment from people gawking at my new mutilated penis, that kind of scarring will not go away that easily.


I don’t really understand why we had to do it. It is just a skin. What do these people have against the foreskin? Even the Japanese are doing it now. This is from the people that actually “celebrate” the penis. Yeah, they called it Japanese Fertility Festival. You can always trust the Japanese to come up with this kind of stuff.

I’m not a big fan of Transformers when I was a kid. I’m a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles kid, through and through, even though the new animated Turtles pissed me off a little bit. So when they announced that they are turning Transformers into a live action movie, I’m the least excited. And with Michael Bay directing the movie, my expectations went even lower. Come on, Michael Bay is not the best director around. Sure, he directed some decent stuff like The Rock and The Island, but that was it. His explosives fetish, most of the time, ruins the movie experience. I’m all for action, but Bay is all action, no substance.


Boy, I was wrong. Well, not entirely. Bay still love his explosive action, but Transformers, to date, is the best Michael Bay film. Michael Bay finally understood the rule of filmmaking, moderation and balance. First of all, Transformers is hilarious! The comedic elements really brighten the film. It comes as somewhat a surprise. I thought the movie is going to be a serious action film, like Bay previous efforts. The cast is amazing, especially Shia LeBouf. I don’t really like him at first, like when I first saw Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic. He grew out of his dorky past and joins the Hollywood power players. We are definitely going to see more of him in the near future.


The action sequences are flawless. This is where Michael Bay works his magic. If you have seen his previous films, namely Bad Boys and The Island, Bay loves the fast pace action sequence in a highway. He gave us that in Transformers, but not with cars, but with giant killer robots. In one scene, a soldier got onto a bike and ride it underneath a Decepticon (the bad Transformers) and shoot it from behind. I can’t really explain it in words, but the scene was bloody brilliant.


The main concern was of course, The Transformers themselves. Those things are huge and combining them with real actors must be a nightmare. Thanks to Industrial Lightning & Magic (Steven Spielberg is this movie main producer), the Transformers animation came out pretty good, although it is hard to identify the Transformers. They move around at a high speed and because of the insane level of details on every Transformers, it’ll take some times to know which is which, with the exception of a couple of the Autobots like Bumblebee and Optimus Prime because of their distinctive colour.


Do I like the movie? Oh yeah, I love it! Will I watch it again? Hell yeah! And though I’m not familiar with the Transformers universe, this movie is easily one of the best films of 2007. A big kudos goes to Michael Bay for not ruining the movie with his previous style. Me liking his new style and hope he sticks with it for his upcoming projects.